The Grand Odalisque or just
The Odalisque
is the Intimate Live Jazz Club
above beautiful downtown Mooresville, Indiana
laGrandeOdalisque
is located above beautiful downtown Mooresville,
Indiana and offers you the chance to briefly escape
from the horrors of beautiful downtown Mooresville,
Indiana. With every step up the worn, wooden
staircase, your troubles, the worries, the sirens,
the hurting and the punching and the thing and the
hey lady and the other thing, magically melt away.
laGrandeOdalisque
offers unique dining experiences. From our deck,
gaze upon majestic herds of blue wildebeests or the
giant stepped ziggurat* or see a breathtaking
birds-eye view of the back alley, the dumpsters and
the building across the street.**
Or you can watch and mock our nerdly karate
neighbors in their silly little pajamas as they
clog the streets and alleys with their minivans,
their little spinning moves, their plastic knives
and swords, their little squeaks and yelps and
their little colored belts. What fun!
And since our overly oppressive city regulations
only allow 1 person to occupy our building at once,
you are assured of the most intimate of
experiences.***
Enjoy live jazz music, cuisine and moderately good
times in a not so much claustrophobic, as a
possibly, more intimate setting, in a decor which
can be described as not too much midwestern but
probably somewhere else, where they speak French,
mostly.
laGrandeodalisque,
where our motto is not "smoke-free" but "freely
smoke." Unlike some other Morgan county
establishments and despite overly obtrusive city
and/or county ordinances, we allow all major brands
of cigarettes to be enjoyed in blissful nicotine
splendor. Our separate and hermetically-sealed
Russian Army surplus air recirculation system means
that not a single whiff of smoke can escape to
offend politcally correct denizens. Neither can any
air enter the confines of
laGrandeOdalisque,
thus never diluting the thick clouds of billowing
tobacco smoke with oxygen. Simply climb our 2 story
staircase and enjoy. There is a landing with a
chair halfway up so that you may catch your breath
before attempting the last leg of the ascent.
Finally, since
laGrandeOdalisque
is adults only, there is no need to worry about
those pesky, loud, annoying pre-pubescent
individuals who seem to be everywhere. Parents, we
know you love your kids, but others probably do not
feel the way you do and really, its adult time up
here. Those who have made the lawfully and
arbitrary 21 solar orbits or more and still possess
all of the other above-mentioned attributes may
still be present, however.
Thank you for virtually visiting
laGrandeOdalisque
from your comfortable surroundings on this, the
world-wide Intra-Web. We look forward to virtually
seeing you sometime in the virtual future and
perhaps one day, even seeing you here at
laGrandeOdalisque
above beautiful downtown Mooresville, Indiana.
*requires
you to bring your wi-fi enabled laptop computer,
appropriate web-surfing thingys and an available
Inter-Web connection. Alternate views from the net
may be available depending on where you surf.
**a computer and connection are not needed for this
viewing option as this is what's actually behind
us.
***Maximum occupancy is 1 (one) person for the 3500
square foot building. City fire codes require you
to wear fire-proof asbestos underwear (rental
underwear available at The Odalisque). A fire
extinguisher and water hose will be held at you, at
the ready, by our crack staff in case of fire. The
city fire departmwent will have a fire truck at the
ready in the alley at all times. For your
protection and at any time, our Halgon-B fire
supression system may be activated, spraying you
down with foam. Please wear stain resistant or
water proof clothing. In case of fire, explosive
bolts loceted in the south wall will be activated
thus creating a 500 square foot exit in which you
can escape. Please wear protective eye-wear to
protect yourself from any flying debris. Any
flammable or possible flammable materials on your
person will be confiscated and placed in an
hermitically sealed EPA metal drum and disposed of
in the flame-proof Mooresville Landfill. You may
pick up your items at the end of your stay at The
Odalisque.
__________________________
Visit
Historic Mooresville, Indiana
Its
Gonna Burst Into Flames Any Second
Now!
© 2007 theGrandOdalisque.com
